Friday, September 16, 2011

Reality Check

Be Realistic.

I'm a hopeless romantic, or well, I was. Romantic gestures are much appreciated but I'm no longer expecting prince charming on his white horse to come scoop me up and save the day. When my boyfriend and I first started dating in high school, I was expecting flowers and gifts all the time. I thought, "if he loves me, then he'll want to get me gifts." This kind of thinking is what prevents your relationships from working. This expectation just isn't realistic.

I know people who will rule out a guy if he's not willing to follow her commands but having an attitude like that will only leave you lonely and bitter. Before dumping him, think to yourself whether or not your demand is feasible and determine if you're willing to compromise. For example, I have a friend who asked her boyfriend to write her essay for her and he said no. But realistically, you can't get mad at someone for not doing something that you don't even want to do.

It's also unrealistic to have a long list of characteristics or qualities you're looking for in a partner. You need to evaluate what's really important to you and base your search on those core values. The more open minded you are, the easier it is for you to find your match. If family is a huge factor in your life, then find someone who shares those values with you. Don't rule out a person because he/she is too tall, too short, doesn't have enough money, or doesn't wear designer labels. All of these qualities are superficial and they can keep you from finding someone who you'll really love and care about.

Basically, if you find someone who you love and loves you back, someone who cares for you and treats you well, then try to make your relationship work. Don't let an unrealistic fantasy stop you from pursuing a relationship.

1 comment:

  1. Exactly - the fluff is nice but it's not what makes a relationship work. I always tell my husband: never get me flowers, flowers die. If you really want to get me something, get me chocolate. Yum.

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